Tootaloo muva fuckerrssssss!!!

From the night before I was feeling a little sore. A three man lift didn't go to plan and me and rob ended up in pieces on the floor!!! I stayed in bed. Alex took stew and rob on a little bike ride around chemal and surrounding mountains. Loads of beautiful scenery everywhere you looked. We met a few hours later. Cooked lunch using the facilities at the camp, then made are way down to the river for a swim. This was a cool place, so we chilled for a few hours here. Met some local kids and played a bit of rugby with them. 

Arriving back at the camp we were greeted by dimitriy a friend of big johns. He invited us to stay at his and use his banya in a few days time. We chilled, played cards and had a few beers. Being professionals at the Russian card game now we managed to actually win a few times. 

The next day big john offered us rafting at a discount price. Shit hot!! This was fun even though the river was less choppy. Dragging and pushing each other off the boat was the best part. We planned to go deeper into the Altai that night but Anna, Tanya and Alex were keen for us to stay. We introduced them to ring of fire. Shit escalated quite quickly and we ended up looser than loose!!!! We sang Father Abraham to them! While naked Anna received a phone call telling us to keep the noise down. Oops....Me Alex, rob and stew went for a late night skinny dip in the river. Stew chucked robs shorts in, so rob repaid the favour by chucking in stews and they washed away down stream. Little did he know it had stews wallet and phone in. Tootaloo muva fuckerrssssss!!!!!! 

We woke up late and prepared to head off. Before heading off we said our goodbyes to the guys. We all got along we'll. They were a great crack and it was nice spending time with them. I could actually see myself marrying a Russia women one day. Altai has been amazing. The scenery is unbelievable and the people are proper sound. A Quality few days spent here 

Baikal was the next destination 2000km away. Apart from how shocking the roads are, the journey went well stopping for food, sleep and a where's willy. 

Dunny 

That @!*# going to let us across? That @*#! lives there!

We left Moscow and headed east, nothing now that we needed to do but drive as far as we could! We are really getting into the journey now and it felt good to drive properly into the unknown. Having done minimal research into the trip we genuinely had no idea what to expect.

Russia is MASSIVE! 

Once we got over the Ural Mountains we where no longer in Europe but in Asia! Tootaloo gay boys! 

Then we drove for four days across the vast Siberian plane which is amazing and dead flat for the whole of it! Eagles, some of the worst roads and bridges ever, more flat land with no one living there, 36 degreesin the day, 'that #¥@* lives there!', a bridge that may be one of those 'pivot bridges' or may be ferried across the river and even more flatness!

Highlight: we went down the M62, which tractors would refuse to drive down in England, and got to possibly the worst bridge ever! Nobby was driving the late shift so me and Dunny where battered and coming up with the most retarded explanations for the bridge! As we drove across 'just put your foot down before they charge us!' We noticed a tent! He did in actual fact live there! We spoke no Russian. (Although we are Fluent now though) he spoke no English, he gave up on us and didn't charge us! Jackpot! After the bridge the road got worse and with big sal in first we (Nobby) hoped for the best... Meanwhile me and Dunny took turns falling asleep with shoes on. I got bananaed and Dunny again had a penis drawn artistically on his head.

Genuinely we have loved it! The scenery didn't change loads but it was like one great view for the four days. Three time zones later and we are shattered and ready for the Altai mountains. Bring on the rafting!

Stewart

Altai Mountains Part 1- Russia

Our first stop in the Altai region was Gorno-Altaysk, the capital of the region and the place where we were meant to register our visa. We tried to find the travel agent for registration but weren't successful. We decided to not bother and just plead ignorance if we got checked.

We headed to find the largest lake in the area up in the mountains, ended up getting lost. We stopped at the side of the road and went for a swim in a river with some locals. We parked up in a layby and got the BBQ and goulash tripod out to cook on. There was an awesome lightening storm. At about midnight three cars pulled up next to us. After reading the Altai region has the second highest crime rate in Russia we were a little spooked. We loaded the van up and drove off. We parked up in a small village and got our heads down. Waking up in the morning was class, we had breakfast on the roof of the van, some inquisitive locals tried speaking Russian to us.  The view was awesome, propper rural village,  guy chopping wood with an axe right next to van and an old lady sat on her veranda opposite. Felt like we were properly in Russia. Photo below of village.

We went to Chemal, much deeper into the mountains, to book some tours. We asked in a local shop and 5 mins later the local tour guide was with us (big John). We agreed to meet him at 10 am the following day for a horse trek the white water rafting in the afternoon. That night we drove a few hundred metres out of town and up on a plateau next to mountains. We made some herbal tea with wild herbs and went for a climb up the mountain.

The next day we met up with big John for probably the best day of the trip so far. We were driven to the river then taken across on a small rib to the stables.  We were given a talk about how to ride a horse, unfortunately being in Russian we didn't understand a word. It was all good we jumped on and headed off. The track took us along the river then up into the mountains. The view was class of the river, mountains and valley.  All in all a great few hours.

We headed off in the afternoon for rafting, it was awesome, some big rapid sections where we were properly thrown around. We made friends with the other people on the tour and the tour guides. When we got back to the van (parked outside the rafting yard) we played volleyball with the giudes, bought some beers and had drinks with the guides. Alex, Tanya, Anya. They were mainly students working during their summer holidays. They invited us into their living area and we drank with them until late. Was a good crack. They gave us some local fish to eat, we reciprocated with beer and vodka.

The day after we woke up with sore heads to one of the guides greeting us with a can of beer. We cooked them eggy bread then played cards around their table. We learnt a Russian card game, called looser, which we will defiantly continue playing. We taught them crazy 8's. We spent hours playing. Thanks guys for being so hospitable. Spasibo!

Rob

In a bit of a rush! Moscow

We had to sort out mongolian visas in moscow. After finding the embassy the night before we set off for it in the morning. The plan was to get a 6 month visa. This seemed hard work, all the women kept saying was "NO VISA 6 MONTHS". So we settled for a 30 day visa which we could extend while there. After this, a light ride around the city was in need. We went to the red square and had a quick view of the kremlin and other sights. Big massive buildings everywhere you looked. All very nice indeed 

On the way back to the van we all got split up in the crazy traffic. Nobby was back first, followed by me   , then stew showed up a while later. (No direction at all). We set off to explore the golden circle at what we thought would be a decent time to miss the traffic. We were wrong!!! It was out of control people beeping, cutting inside you, outside you, driving down the hard shoulder no system at all. As we moved away from the city the traffic died down, so we stopped for supplies (vodka) and made are way to a lake to spend the night. We ended up being quite loose!! Big sal hit the 600000 mile mark on this journey. Go on you beauty!! 

The next morning we admired the sights around the lake and moved on. Every village
around the golden circle was littered with church's. All very grand places, something in between mosques and churches. We arrived at kostroma where we went to a banya. Basically a sauna hut. This was quality!! spend 10 minutes in the sauna and then jump in a plunge pool outside. We played heads or tails to see who put there face in front of steam. Not recommended at all!! We spent 2 hours in there, by this time refreshed and ready for a pint we moved on to the next village. A recommended bar from lonely planet was the destination "dudki bar". Nothing to special to be fair! 

After a short ride around the town the next day we made are way back to Moscow to collect our visas. Making sure not to hit the rush hours traffic again we stopped of at the same lake as before, had some grub, done some weights and set off. The skyline was unbelievable as we entered moscow. So we chilled admiring this before hitting the sack.

A day of sightseeing was on the agenda this morning. Waking up a bit late made us not see much apart from looking around town and seeing the red square. We heard the moscow state circus was one to see, so that night we attended. What a decision this was. Full of acrobatics, seals doing tricks, tigers, leopards and a clown that was actually quite funny. Bearing in mind we couldn't understand a word he was saying. We'll worth a visit! On the way home we stopped off at the red suare. Absoloutely unreal at night. With the circus still on our minds we tried some acrobatics ourself (see picture below) 

We took the metro back to the van. 3 different lines and 10 stops later we were back

Again trying to avoid traffic we set of for the Ural Mountains 1500km east of moscow. Before you know it stuck in traffic again. Does this place never sleep!! Our option was to drive through the night each taking a few hours kip in the back while someone else drives. This worked we'll and we are on route. Bring on the mountains 

Dunny 

Latvia (post lash) and Estonia

Once we'd got out of the city, relieved to be in the clear, we headed for national parks. Found a cracking spot at the bottom of some of the first decent hills we'd seen so far, right near some caves where people had engraved their names going back to the 1700's. A great spot for our next where's willy. 

A morning hike took us to castles, great views, streams, rivers and the least safe cable car we've ever seen! Crumbling down, literally looked derilict and was cordoned off. Nope you could bungee jump from it over the 100m+ drop! Banging! Unfortunately only open on Thursday and Saturday... Obviously.

Over the next couple of days we got out on the bikes a lot, tearing around tracks and routes that were in construction. A bit dodgey but great crack, sometimes the tracks just stopped though and there would be a drop and half a bridge, there was one sign though so they where covered/not bothered. We swam a river that flowed a lot faster on the far side, getting back was hard work! Broke into a castle by accident, climbed the back wall and got involved with all the stuff on offer: view towers over the valley, walked the parapet, got dressed in all old clothes, used swords and spears, filled up the bottles and made a swift exit out the back again. We got to ring a massive church bell, not sure if we where meant to or not, really loud by our heads. 

After the national park we headed for Tallinn. Picked up a hitchhiker and she was on her way to a concert to the east of Tallinn. We gave her a lift to her home town where we were able to print all our stuff for Russia, train in a car park, then pick her and her mate up and head to the concert. They were working there and got us in cheap. None of us has been to a concert in such a quality place! Set in the national park with the backdrop of the sea where saw seals whilst the concert was on. No idea what the music was about, Estonian country music, nice though. After the concert we headed off to Tallinn, and went straight out. Harley Davidson convention in town and loads of weirdos! Got chatting to a crazy Finnish bloke who I think loved dunny, he just kept shouting the names of English football players.

In the morning we heard scraping on the van, some little shits where trying to rob the bikes. They ran off before we could get out the van and luckily they didn't get anything. Time to increase security before Russia. We spent the next two days on the beach training, chilling, having fires and securing the van. We had one night out in Tallinn where we managed to get onto a free VIP buffet and champagne, dunno how it happened! Then a look round Tallinn, postcard town! Then we headed to another national park by the sea and from there to Russia!

Stewie

Entering Russia to St. Petersburg

We have finished the first stage of our journey through Europe. We have left the safety of the EU and are beginning the next stage through Russia. We have had an amazing time, seen and experienced some awesome things and met lots of cool people.

4000 miles done in just under two months across europe, now we have about 6000 miles to do in 30 days. Its going to be a busy month!

We prepared as much as we could for the border crossing, all documents printed and filed, van clean and we even booked a time slot at the border. Get us! We were expecting a strip search and a good rogering. The border crossing was actually pretty straightforward, no extra costs, just the usual paperwork to fill out. The guards had a bit of a look around the van, checking for stowaways and drugs. All in all the border crossing took about 1.5 hours, most of which we were sat in a que. We were in Russia! We were greeted by a nice surprise, fuel is 55p a litre!

We drove the 100km to St. Petersburg, Russians second city and our first stop. We had a hostel booked right next to the river. It was ideal, parking space for the van right outside, free laundry service (we took full advantage of that) and loads of friendly people. Based on our previous lucky good timings, what was going to be in stall for us in St. Petersburg? The girl on the desk in the hostel said it was National Russia independence day. The day Russia became independent from the Soviet Union. And to celebrate there was a free music festival on the beach, obviously. We had lunch in the hostel kitchen and met Alexander. A biker from North Russia, travelling by himself and was going to the music festival. We finished lunch and headed off on a bus together. The festival was good and we watched a display of kite surfers. 

Alexander kindly gave us a tour around the city, and what a city it is! We've never seen as many grand buildings in close proximity. Some serious money has been spent in the last few hundred years, when a lot of rural Russians were struggling to feed themselves! There seemed to be a massive range of wealth which the photo below shows nicely, a Ferrari parked next to a Lada.  And that is a nice Lada, it has bumpers!

We spent the next day sightseeing, went to the Russian museum which is a massive palace full of nice art. Not my cup of tea but still good to see. We went to a church where the entire inside is mosaic art, pretty impressive. We spent the evening sitting out the front of the hostel drinking with Alexander and the hostel worker, also called Alexander. It was good fun. We were allowed to use the hostel shower, toilet and kitchen whenever we wanted even though we didn't sleep there that night. Later on a group of salsa dancers came back to the hostel and set up on the pavement, we joined in but weren't very good.
In the morning Stew went to the Hermatage museum, the must see palace and art exhibition in St. Petersburg. Stew thoroughly enjoyed it but me and Dunny had enough art the day before so decided to give it a miss.

We set off that night to Vlinky Novgorod to see a Kremlin, a massive walled town which was cool, see photo below. That afternoon we set off for Moscow. 550k down a rough motorway. Lots of traffic and potholes. Surprising considering it was linking two rich cities in a world superpower. We arrived in Moscow at 3am and parked up for the night.

Rob

Stew and Niki Tallinn and Helsinki

In the morning I woke up to the sound of the lads snoring, had a cold shower (woke me up a treat) and headed to say goodbye to Juri. He got out of his bed, washed his face and, refusing to take no for an answer, he walked me to the station. A brief train journey to town and I managed to get a 5hour bus to Tallinn. Halfway through the journey and extremely hungry (nothing to eat all day) we stopped to have a pit stop (the driver wanted a fag). As the bus started moving again I ran to the front to tell the driver that the lady sitting next to me on the bus wasn't there... He spoke almost no English 'yes, ok!' I tried again and so did some other tourists...he was having none of it and we continued.

I waited with all the brought brides for our british partners. Niki arrived and we caught the bus to Tallinn. The hotel is lush, with the luck continuing from Riga we have landed another festival!

A massive burger and live music on the square went down a treat. Tallinn is so good! The weather and the architecture explained the popularity with tourists from all over the world. Our hotel is as close to the main square in Old Town as it is possible to be. The only thing which let's Tallinn down is the amount of tourists, because of this it's the most expensive place we've been but you can't be a tourist and complain about them.

Now, to be a full on tourist! After a trip to the tourist information, we set about doing as much in Tallinn (mainly free stuff) that we could. We walked around the town and the wall, we saw 'Fat Margaret' - the town's main gunning point - and a few nice churches from the outside. After a long day we got home and I was so excited...a hot shower! I don't think I have been so happy at the prospect of 5 days of hot showers! 

As we have seen so much in Tallinn I will shorten it to the highlights...

A walk up the hill on the seaward side gives amazing views over the city. We did this more than once. We went up to the top of St Olaf's church in the wind and rain, which, aside from the amazing view of Tallinn, has a 127m spire which was used by the KGB in the 80s to transmit and receive radio and other broadcasts. The KGB hotel museum is fascinating, proper old school James Bond! They built a hotel which was the only hotel where foreigners where allowed to stay in Estonia, so the KGB could monitor everyone. In the plans for the hotel they left peep holes, spy camera holes, listening devices along with spare rooms and the whole 23rd floor to house the KGB's equipment! When asked why guests weren't allowed to the 23rd floor the KGB replied 'there is no 23rd floor'. 'But we can see it!' 'Don't ask questions!' When this finally didn't work the official line was that... 'The view from the 23rd floor is too good, it would be dangerous!' Wtf! 

A special mention to Tallinn zoo, if you get the chance go there. We weren't expecting much, but they have everything! Polar bears, crocodiles, monkeys, heard of buffalo, lions, tigers, snow leopards and the list continues! Some of the enclosures are top notch and, whilst they are trying really hard and are obviously developing and moving in the right direction, the polar bears are stuck in a communist concrete cage which looks so sad. The polar bear cub was playing in the same bit of water that looked like a sheep dip trying to get a bowling ball out for over an hour!

Now onwards to Helsinki. We booked the first crossing of the day and the last crossing back, leaving us about 12 hours to see it. After a stop at tourist information to make a plan... Everyone needs a plan! ;) we set off. The market place, Uspenski Cathedral (strange prayer going on involving lots of chanting, tried to get involved - awwwwaaaallllliiieee walllowwwaaaaliee), over the lock bridge to Helsinki Cathedral "Rocky steps" (everyone pounded the sky at the top.) Then to an art gallery. After about an hour we realised it was a gallery almost entirely devoted to the lady who drew the Moomims! Apparently she is a big deal here! When we asked the guard 'so we've seen all the rooms up there, tell me, is it all about the Moomims?' With such pride he replied 'yes!' We got our money back. It was interesting though, but not worth £10 each. Once you've seen 50 moomim paintings and sketches they loose their charm, lol. We headed from there to a graveyard which was down as a must see...it was amazing! More of a well looked after park with benches, trees, flowers, bushes and so many interesting graves (artists hill is an area where artists are buried and they all design their own stone, unfortunately no Moomims though). I said to Niki that it's weird that some people here would have been Nazis! We had a little look and saw some of the Nazi decorative crosses on graves but thought we must be making something of nothing, until we came upon a grave with a 3D picture of a soldier in full uniform, heading the stone was two swastikas! 

After the graveyard we headed to the rock church, a church built into the rock and probably one of the most relaxing buildings I have ever been into.

Back to Tallinn and a couple of nice meals, some beers, more site seeing and it was time to say goodbye. I've had a really good week in Tallinn with Niki and was sad to see her leave. But now back to Riga to meet the lads and Dewi's stag do! It's a hard life... 

Stewie